How Much Money Do You Give at a Turkish Wedding?
When it comes to wedding gifts in Turkey, there isn't a one-size-fits-all rule. The amount of money given can vary widely based on your relationship to the couple, your financial situation, and local customs. This article aims to provide a comprehensive guide to understanding the expectations and practices associated with giving wedding gifts in Turkey.
Guidelines for Different Types of Guests
Close Family Members: For parents or close relatives, the amount given can range from 10,000 to 20,000 Turkish Lira (TL), depending on their financial means. This significant sum reflects the close bond and support provided by these family members.
Friends and Extended Family: For friends or more distant relatives, a common range for the gift is between 1,000 and 5,000 TL. The specific amount may vary based on the closeness of the relationship and the financial situation of both parties.
Acquaintances: When giving to acquaintances, it is typical to provide around 500 to 1,000 TL. In this case, the sum is less due to the less intimate relationship but still reflects a gesture of goodwill.
Cultural Context and Pre-2005 Turkish Currency Practices
Gold Coins or Jewelry: In some regions, it is customary to give gold coins or jewelry, which can have significant sentimental value. These items are often considered more traditional than cash gifts and are highly valued. For example, in certain areas, a 30 TL worth of gold is preferred over cash, as its value will increase over time.
No Specific Minimum Amount: Another important point is that there is no universally accepted minimum amount for wedding gifts. The amount can vary widely depending on the city's habits, traditions, and the couple's social status. For instance, a wedding gift of 10,000 TL might be considered acceptable in some places, while in others, 40,000 TL would be more appropriate.
Gold vs. Cash Gifts
Preference for Gold: Interestingly, in Turkish culture, people often prefer giving gold coins or jewelry over cash. This is due to the fluctuating value of the Turkish Lira. For example, a 100 TL note is less preferred compared to a gold coin or jewelry piece that is worth about 30 TL. The reason behind this is that the value of the gold will likely increase in the future, making it a better investment. However, this doesn't mean that cash gifts are frowned upon; rather, giving gold is seen as a more generous gesture.
Use of Gold as Payment: Sometimes, if gold is given as a gift, the bride or the couple may use it to pay for services on the day of the wedding, such as paying the band, photographer, and caterer. This reduces the wedding debt and makes the day more manageable for the couple.
Personal Anecdote
One interesting example from my personal experience is when I purchased a silver tin crescent and star necklace with Ataturk’s head as a gift for a close friend's wedding. Unfortunately, it was stolen. Then, on my next trip to Turkey, my Aunt gave me 100 German Marks, which were equivalent to 100 Australian dollars before the year 1995. With this money, I commissioned a custom-made gold necklace. Although the gold and the design were not perfectly balanced, it was still valued as it had sentimental and monetary worth. Eventually, I sold it back to the jeweler for less, but the gold price had increased since then, and I ended up getting my 100 AUD back. This experience highlights the value and variability of currency in Turkish culture.
In conclusion, while there is no strict rule for the amount to give at a Turkish wedding, it is important to consider the relationship with the couple, your financial situation, and the local customs. Ultimately, giving what you feel comfortable with and what reflects your relationship is the best approach. Whether you choose to give a cash gift or a gold piece with sentimental value, the gesture of support and goodwill is what truly matters.