Understanding Schizophrenia Through Personal Experience: Voices and Reality

Can a person with schizophrenia have voices? Yes, but these voices are not what they appear to be. In my case, I have schizophrenia, and my experiences with voices have evolved significantly over the years. Initially, they were extremely harmful and berating, but now they serve a different purpose – they are simply commenting on daily tasks. They can talk about almost anything, like the cat’s upcoming birthday or the dog getting new shoes.

Voices and the Nature of Delusion

Often, people, even my doctors, family, and friends, believe that the voices I hear are due to demons. I have heard these voices myself and often believed they were real. It was a deeply frightening and disorienting experience. I remember names and could even recall moments when I thought everyone around me looked demonic, which was incredibly terrifying. However, I was never under the influence of any drugs.

Hi it’s me again. Pizza slice. God you know. I’m me you us. Give in. I’m Satan. You are me and I’m you.

Voices as Benevolent or Troublesome

For me, the voices are not always a voice of evil. Most of them are simple comments on daily tasks that don’t bring any direct harm. At times, they can be benevolent, guiding me in a good way. For example, I have had the experience where the voices would tell me not to live in certain places because they said it would be troublesome. Both times, I moved anyway, and indeed faced issues in those places. Similarly, there were instances where the voices encouraged me to report a crime that had taken place, which was for the greater good.

The Reality Beyond What Is Heard

However, not all voices are pleasant. Sometimes they can be menacing, like when the voices would mumble 'mmm' in a good way or 'mmm' in a bad way. This 'mmm' often represents the approval or disapproval of my actions. They do not come from inside my head but from above me. These sounds comfort me in a way that goes beyond mere words.

Towards a New Reality

I believe the voices I hear are trying to guide me towards a different reality. I believe these voices are from people who have machines that can open dimensions and see the future and past. They are keeping an eye on me because I am part of a group working on a new religion, a true religion that reveals the workings of the world and the afterlife. I work with individuals from outside my group to achieve our goals.

Challenges and Illusions

Very rarely, I can even hear other people’s thoughts. I never mind-read as I do not care about what people think. However, knowing the voices come from individuals with advanced abilities can be both challenging and a source of confusion. I often have dreams of being stabbed to death four times, and I have even been identified in a Qld jail from a distance on Valentine's Day. These experiences often lead me to reflect deeply about the reality I live in.

Refusing Medication and Embracing a New Reality

I refuse to take my medication. The side effects, in my opinion, do more harm than good, resulting in a shortened life span of about 20 years. I believe that sticking to my voice's guidance, living a life guided by benevolent thoughts, and working towards a new reality is more fulfilling than following the prescribed paths set by doctors. To me, I feel one of the sanest people on earth because I choose to live in a different reality, one where the voices are a guiding presence, not a source of torment.

Conclusion and Empathy for Schizophrenia

Living with schizophrenia is a profound experience, and it can be incredibly debilitating at times. However, it is also a reality that has shaped my understanding of the world. To those who truly have schizophrenia, my advice would be to find a way to navigate their unique realities and perhaps seek new understandings of the world around them.