The Process of Ending Therapy: A Guide for Clients
Ending therapy can be a significant milestone in one's personal growth journey. This guide aims to provide clients with a clear understanding of the process and offer advice on how to approach their therapist when the time comes.
Understanding the Transition
It is crucial to communicate your intentions to your therapist openly and honestly. Simply letting your therapist know that you no longer feel the need for therapy or that you no longer feel a good rapport with them is the start of the process. This communication should be done during your session, and not by text or email, to ensure it is discussed thoroughly and sensitively.
Discussing Your Intentions
Typically, the therapy process includes regular sessions. If you choose to terminate your therapy, it is important to discuss this during a session. You might share that you’ve been thinking about “taking a break” or “stopping therapy.” This discussion helps to address and heal from past experiences of endings, which might have been problematic. It is also a good opportunity to reflect on what parts of the therapy were helpful and what didn’t sit well with you. This feedback is invaluable to your therapist and ensures they can provide even better support moving forward.
Agreeing on a termination phase is important. This phase should not be the same session or done via text or email. It’s essential to summarize the work you’ve done, emphasizing what was helpful and what didn’t. This can help you leave the therapeutic relationship on a positive note and facilitate your growth and understanding of the process.
It can be beneficial to leave open the possibility of returning to therapy in the future. This forward-thinking approach can be a powerful tool for enhancing your growth and self-awareness.
Session Closures and Client Control
During a therapy session, when the client has relaxed, become aroused, and then reached their release, they often signal the end of the session by saying "Okay." At this point, the session will slow down and ultimately stop. A confirmed "Okay" or an additional "more" can be used to finalize the session.
In another scenario, a client in group therapy found it beneficial for the therapist to nod off at the end of the session. This gentle transition was both humorous and supportive, as the therapist was present but not overly intrusive. It allowed for a comfortable and respectful ending of the therapy session.
Personal Reflection and Self-Awareness
As you approach the end of your therapy, engaging in self-reflection is essential. Consider asking yourself and teach kids to ask:
Deep down, does this person make me feel more — or less — whole and safe? Does this person act morally superior to me? Does this person blame me for relationship problems all the time? Can I tell them anything without expecting a chastising verbal spanking? Do I look too much to this person to “keep me in line”?These questions can help you assess the dynamics of your relationship with your therapist and ensure that you are maintaining a healthy and supportive environment for your personal growth.
Additional Resources
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