Why do INFJs Get So Close to People Then Go Away?

An INFJ is a unique personality type, often referred to as the Intensity of Emotions for the depth and complexity of their feelings. INFJs see the best in people and form unconditional love when they connect with someone genuine. However, this love can be ambiguous and confusing for both the INFJ and those around them. This article delves into the reasons behind this behavior, focusing on intrinsic traits like emotional depth, fear of vulnerability, need for solitude, overthinking, and the desire for authenticity.

Emotional Depth

INFJs experience emotions intensely. While this can deepen their connections, it also means that they may feel overwhelmed. The intensity of these feelings can lead them to create emotional distance to regain balance. This is a natural process, but it can be misinterpreted, leading to misunderstandings and loneliness.

Fear of Vulnerability

While INFJs yearn for deep emotional connections, they also have a pronounced fear of vulnerability. Once they open up, they may feel exposed. This fear can trigger a protective mechanism, leading them to pull away as a form of self-preservation. It is not about a lack of affection but a struggle to maintain emotional stability.

Need for Solitude

After forming close bonds, INFJs often withdraw to recharge. Alone time is essential for them to regain their energy. This behavior is not a sign of aloofness but a natural need to process their emotions and re-energize before engaging deeper again.

Overthinking

INFJs are known for their analytical minds. They often analyze relationships deeply, which can lead to overthinking. This habit can manifest in self-doubt and a desire to withdraw until they feel secure. Overthinking can cause them to question the authenticity of connections and retreat from those that don’t meet their high standards.

Desire for Authenticity

INFJs value authenticity deeply. They seek deep, meaningful relationships and may distance themselves if they feel that a connection is not genuine. They strive for honesty and authenticity in their interactions. When they find that a relationship is not as sincere as they hoped, they may pull back to protect themselves from disappointment.

Idealism

INFJs often have high ideals about relationships. They may feel disappointed when reality does not match their expectations, leading them to retreat. They set high standards and can be critical of themselves and others. When their expectations are not met, they may disengage to avoid further heartache.

Protecting Others

Sometimes, INFJs pull back to protect others from their own struggles or emotional turmoil. They may believe it is better for everyone involved to maintain emotional distance. While this behavior is driven by a desire to help, it can also stem from a place of fear. They may worry about triggering negative reactions or burdening others with their problems.

Understanding and Navigating Relationships

To navigate these complexities, open communication about needs and boundaries is crucial. Both INFJs and those around them need to understand and respect these inherent traits. Clear and honest dialogue can help in maintaining connections and fostering deeper understanding.

For more insights into INFJs and their unique ways of connecting, follow my page for more content:

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