Should You Send a Handmade Gift to Your Ex?

When you find yourself in the throes of post-breakup confusion and wonder whether to send a longstanding handmade gift to your ex, it's important to step back and engage in some serious self-reflection. This decision could have deep implications for both you and your ex's future, especially if the relationship is still secluded within the tender area of your memories and past love.

Understanding the Subtext

Many times, people find themselves asking for advice on such matters, only to proceed with actions that are contrary to the prescribed advice. It's a pattern of behavior that can lead to unnecessary stress and regret. The following discussion aims to provide a clear perspective and offer guidance to help you navigate this complex emotional landscape.

Reflect on Your Motives

Begin by acknowledging why you're considering sending the gift. If breaking up and no longer maintaining contact with your ex are part of your recent reality, sending the gift could be an excuse to see her, or it might be a ploy to get her to reconsider and possibly move in the direction of reconciliation. Understanding your true intentions is critical; they may not be as harmless as they seem.

Assessing the Reception

If your ex is in the process of moving on, sending the gift might only exacerbate the situation. Here's a glimpse of the possible scenarios:

If She Is a Jerk: She might meet up to get your gift but will probably reject it outright with disdain, leading to more hurt and disappointment. If She Is Not a Jerk: She may reject meeting up with you, knowing you're trying to get an advantage out of sending the gift. Or, she might agree to see you, hoping the gift opens the door to reconciliation, but it's doubtful that such a gift would move the needle significantly in that direction.

Considering the Gift's Authenticity

It's essential to evaluate the gift in the context of your relationship. Was it genuinely a romantic or sentimental gesture, or did you purchase it as a favor to her, perhaps because she mentioned it to you or found it in a free pile on the sidewalk?

A more Subtle Approach

A better course of action might be to send a text that candidly states your thoughts without any ulterior motives:

“Hey lady. Hope you're well. No ulterior motive, I swear, but the day before you dumped me for no good reason, I bought you whatever the hell it is, and frankly, I'm kinda sick of looking at it. If you're still interested in it, I can swing it by this week and just leave it on your porch. Otherwise, I've been decluttering, and I have a box to take to Goodwill, so I'll throw it in there. Let me know. No worries either way.”

This approach acknowledges the separation and the cluttering of the past without any intention to reconquer or repel through the gift.

Conclusion

Ultimately, the decision to send a handmade gift to your ex should be based on a clear understanding of your feelings and the potential impact on your ex. Though the choice is yours, remember that the path you choose can lead to different destinations. Sending a gift might seem like a simple act, but it can carry significant emotional weight and potential consequences. Prioritize your self-reflection and ensure that your actions align with your intentions and respect your ex's wishes for closure and healing.