Navigating Life and Love at 30: The Challenges and Choices

For most of my life, until my 41st birthday, I never realized why socializing, flirting, dating, and generally getting to a second date and beyond was supposed to be my destiny. Then, I figured out I have autism. With this realization, I embarked on a long journey to fill the gaps in my social skills and learn how attraction works. Until now, marriage remains a distant dream for me.

Male Perspective: Embracing Independence

From a male perspective, things look different. You still have freedom, and you can date various girls, do what you want when you want. If you are good-looking, have many hobbies, and a strong social circle, being single in your 30s is not necessarily a bad idea. Many men in their 30s have been married, had kids, divorced, and are single again. There’s no drama in that.

The Good

You are much more mature now than you were in your twenties. You know the difference between a short-term and a long-term relationship. You have a better idea of what you want in a person, even if it’s not every detail. You know who you are. Career-wise, you are well into your career.

The Challenges

You think you have time, but you don’t. You are enjoying the surface-level fun of life, and time flies by unnoticed. If you don’t lock yourself down in your 30s, you are likely to be an older parent when you want kids. Being in your 60s with a 20-year-old child may not be considered fresh. When you become a couple and then have a child, 9 out of 10 people will find they can no longer enjoy and explore freely. Many men are forgoing marriage altogether in this day and age, as there are more minuses than positives. Men prefer to live together, have children, and avoid being tied down to one woman. Divorce is a significant concern, and most men pay a high price for it, so they prefer to avoid marriage altogether.

Marriage and Its Benefits

Married men tend to live longer, have lower levels of stress, and, according to my guess, eat better. They have clothes cleaned and shirts ironed, someone to come home to at night, and, if lucky, get regular sex on tap. However, a majority of marriages tend to be sexless after the ten-year mark, defined as having sex once a month or less.

Conclusion

Don’t rush into marriage just yet. Explore and enjoy life as a single person until you are fully ready. Once you become a couple and have a child, 9 out of 10 people find they cannot enjoy and explore freely anymore, which is a significant consideration for anyone contemplating marriage.