Life After Adversity: A Journey Back to Resilience
Life has its ups and downs, and there isn’t a more stark reminder of that than the seven years I spent in the wake of one of the worst periods of my life. In 2013, I lost everything—my father, my brother-in-law, and my beloved dog all passed away within a short span of time. My sister and her ex-husband made my life a living hell, and I lost trust in my entire circle. That was the most daunting period of my life, and it left me questioning how much I could endure.
A New Beginning in 2013
Seven years ago, in the summer of 2013, I was a completely different person, full of joy and anticipation. I discovered Quora, a place where I could engage with smart and funny people, an experience that was vastly different from the much-criticized version of Quora we see today. I was a new parent with a great job and a hands-off boss, which allowed me to concentrate on my goals with no distractions.
A Near Death Experience
August 2013 marked a turning point in my life, but not in a way I had anticipated. I nearly died from Basilar strokes. I survived three strokes within a week, making me a rare .01 survivor. The deadly nature of these strokes—it kills 97 out of every 100 people—leaves one contemplating how lucky one can be. My life was forever changed; I couldn’t work, and I now carry a constant reminder of the fragility of life.
Health Challenges and Misdiagnoses
Seven years ago, before my health crisis, my life was somewhat stable. I didn’t need a feeding tube, and I was unaware I had a condition called Gastroparesis, which would affect me in the future. My life was marked by chronic pain and other issues, but I was able to work.
Personal Trauma and Family Disintegration
Those were also the years leading up to a difficult separation with my wife. We split up, and the worst years of my life followed. The emotional pain of losing someone so close to me was like nothing I had experienced before. I learned just how deeply one can love and also how devastating the end of a relationship can be.
Retirement and New Beginnings
It was during this tumultuous time that I decided to retire. The first few years of my retirement were great—relaxing, hiking, traveling, and enjoying the company of friends. Then, five and a half years ago, my daughter brought a baby boy into the world. Despite being a single mother by choice, she has managed to excel academically and professionally, though she owes a significant amount in student loans.
Raising a Challenging Child
Our grandson is a beautiful, but challenging, boy. He is autistic and requires constant attention, interaction, and specialized therapies. The journey to obtain these therapies has been a daunting one, as our efforts have been repeatedly thwarted. Respite care is necessary for our family to survive, but it has been difficult to find reliable caregivers. Caring for a child with special needs is a team effort, and patience is a must.
A New Reality
While I have a beautiful child in my life, I have had to give up almost everything I once loved. I have had to adapt to a new reality where my every day is decided by my grandson's needs. School therapies, his need for constant interaction—all of these have become a part of my daily life. It is a struggle, but knowing how lucky I am to still be here, I embrace this new reality with a renewed sense of resilience.
Though life has been challenging, I have managed to return stronger than I ever expected. I no longer trust everyone, but I have learned to trust myself, my loved ones, and the support systems built around us. This journey, while rocky, has taught me invaluable lessons about resilience and the importance of adaptability in the face of adversity.