Family Connections: Visiting Grandparents and Modern Family Compounds
How often do your grandparents visit your house? This question resonates for many, but as someone whose grandparents lived far and never visited, the answer is rarely.
Grandparent Visits and Family Dynamics
My mother's step-father lived with us for a while when I was young, but my mother's birth father, my grandpa, passed away in a car accident when she was a baby. My other grandpa and grandma never visited us, and we always visited them. Since my grandmother rarely left the small township where she lived, we even offered to drive her to visit us in Florida. However, she never left her house and didn't even want to spend time on the boat we had docked within a ten-minute drive of her home. Sadly, all those involved are now deceased.
Today, the vast majority of grandparent interaction occurs at their home, which can sometimes create amusing and endearing situations. For example, it's fascinating to see a 25-inch cathode ray TV sitting on the floor in their living room, with family photos displayed on top. My grandmother would proudly explain who was in the photos, but the illusion of modernity was shattered when I pulled out my phone and she asked, 'Where are the wires? How does that work without them'
Modern Family Dynamics and Rurality
Despite the challenges, I am grateful that my family visits almost daily. My daughter and grandson live on one side of me, while my mother and son live on the other. In 1976, my parents bought a rural property and built a house, and in 1985, when my husband and I were planning our family, we built a home beside my parents. Fast forward 30 years, and my father passed away suddenly, leading my son to create an apartment on the second floor of my mother's house for himself. My daughter and family moved to the countryside, and my husband and I were ready for a smaller home, so we built one between the two houses. My daughter moved into the original house, and now we have our very own family compound in a loving and close-knit way. We are not actually on top of one another, but each of us can see at least one other home. Our daily interactions, as neighbors, are harmonious, and we respect each other's space and boundaries.
Living in such a setup, my grandson, the cutest nearly six-year-old ever born, can wander into any house whenever he chooses, and the cats in all the homes have at least one and recognize no boundaries! This unique living arrangement fosters a strong sense of family, while also maintaining the privacy and independence needed in a family compound.
Conclusion
A family compound, like the one I describe, can offer a unique blend of togetherness and independence, where grandparent visits are rare, but family connections remain strong. While it may not suit everyone, for those who find it works, it provides a close-knit environment that many find rewarding.
Keywords: family compound, grandparent visits, rural living