Enduring Crushes: When 12 Years of Infatuation Aren’t Just a Crush Anymore
Having a crush on someone for 12 years is an unusual and often complex experience. Unlike typical crushes that ebb and flow over a short period, this kind of prolonged attraction often signifies deeper and more meaningful feelings. It might be evolving into a long-term attachment, infatuation, or even love. While the term 'crush' can feel inadequate, it’s essential to understand the nature of these intense and enduring emotions.
UnTECTED ATTRACTION
It’s true that being infatuated with someone for a decade or more might not fit the conventional definition of a crush. However, it’s important to appreciate the significance and complexity of these feelings. Life is full of missed opportunities and regrets, and sometimes, it’s challenging to express your romantic feelings openly. Taking the time to get to know the person and understand their personality is crucial. What if the person you’ve had a crush on for years is not the right fit for you?
While it might be tempting to delay expressing your feelings, the 'right moment' might never come. However, if you’ve had occasional interactions or the other person has been aware of you, your next step won't be a surprise. Your chances of success will be higher, and you can open up more authentically.
CRUSH VERSUS ROMANCE
A crush, in my view, refers to romantic feelings for someone that cannot or are not reciprocated. This might include a celebrity, teacher, or a classmate when you’re young. After 12 years, the person might have found a different relationship or have dealt with the feelings in a healthy manner. However, if these feelings have endured for so long, they don’t fit neatly into the same category of a brief infatuation. Something profoundly different is likely at play.
The internet commonly defines a ‘crush’ as a brief infatuation with someone, typically considered inappropriate or unattainable. According to this definition, an infatuation lasting 12 years is nonsensical. However, feelings don’t automatically expire just because a certain amount of time has passed. If we accept the conventional definition, what do we call feelings that last longer than a month, a year, or even two years? Do these feelings change simply because we pass a certain time threshold?
DEFINING EMOTIONS
It’s arbitrary to define someone else’s feelings for them. Just because you think a year is brief, it doesn’t mean the feelings are invalid. We shouldn’t get to define other people’s experiences and emotions. If a crush lasts longer than the conventional definition, it is simply a different kind of feeling. Call it what it is, and respect the complexity of human emotions.
CONCLUSION
12 years of infatuation is a significant period, and it’s worth contemplating the nature of these feelings. Whether this enduring attraction is a crush, a prolonged infatuation, or evolving into love, it’s important to understand and respect these complex emotions. Understanding the other person and their personality is crucial in deciding whether to pursue a relationship. Acknowledge the emotional journey and respect the time and depth of the feelings involved.