How People with Aspergers Syndrome Experience Emotions: A Personal Perspective
Introduction:
The experience of emotions can vary significantly for individuals with Aspergers syndrome. While some might exhibit hyperempathy, others may struggle with alexithymia. It is important to note that Aspergers is no longer a recognized diagnosis, and many people within the autism community prefer to avoid using this term.
Emotions Across the Board
The manner and intensity with which individuals with Aspergers experience emotions can differ from neurotypical individuals. Emotional triggers and reactions can also vary widely. This article aims to shed light on the emotional experiences of those with Aspergers syndrome through a personal perspective.
A Personal Meltdown
The Grief and Grief-Inducing Toy
Yesterday, I was overwhelmed with grief and began to cry in my car when I had to dispose of a cherished toy. This toy, a barbecue grill, had belonged to my youngest child during their childhood and was a source of joy. However, today, as a teenager, they refuse to cook and barely eat, facing constant stomach pain—conditions that are yet undiagnosed. The toy was too damaged to be resold, and my plans to do so had been in place for years. This realization, coupled with the history of its existence and the realization of my child's current struggles, led to an emotional meltdown.
This experience is known as a 'meltdown,' a term often used to describe the intense emotional response that many autistic individuals can have to overwhelming emotions. It is more common for them to suffer from these reactions than for neurotypical individuals.
Cognitive Differences in Emotional Processing
The emotions we process often stem from different sources than neurotypical individuals. We may attach immense significance to seemingly trivial items, while at the same time struggle with more complex emotions. For instance, we might risk our lives to retrieve a beloved object, such as a stuffed animal, even in a burning building, while simultaneously finding it challenging to express affection in traditional ways.
Personally, I find that expressing love through practical actions, such as offering help and doing favors, is more meaningful to me than saying 'I love you,' because those words often feel hollow. I only offer hugs when specifically asked, a habit I've maintained since my children were around 8 or 9 years old.
Empathy and Emotional Masking
As individuals with Aspergers, we may have difficulty understanding the emotions of neurotypical people. However, once we do grasp those emotions, our empathy can be profound. Reading about someone's suffering compels me to imagine how I would feel in their situation. Yet, when someone is putting on a happy face, I might overlook signs of underlying distress, either because I cannot see them or because I think the person hiding their emotions does not want to be caught. Similarly, I may avoid offering a hug to someone hiding their emotions, as I don't want to impose on them if they are trying to appear composed.
These differences highlight the unique experiences and emotional processes of individuals with Aspergers syndrome. Understanding and empathizing with these experiences can help foster more inclusive and supportive environments.