A Random Moment That Changed My Life for the Better: A Story of Transformation

Transformations are either good or bad in life. But they are always inevitable. Life puts us in situations that will break our carefully built persona and order us to create a new one with the shattered pieces. In this article, I will share a story of a friend of mine that changed him. This is something that happened to him during his residency, a moment that altered his perspective and helped him grow in unexpected ways.

The Jolly Residency Doctor

My friend, who I will call Dr. Raj, had always been an extremely jolly and chill person. He used to be so lively with his patients that even a simple talk with him would lighten their moods, despite being in a sorry state. Furthermore, he believed that sick or not, all people should be happy nonetheless. He had never got angry or frustrated with the troublesome patients or the workload that was put on him. He knew that the establishment cannot always move like a well-oiled machine. Likewise, he cannot expect everyone to be in their best shape always. He cannot expect everyone to be as dedicated or as smart as he was. So he accepted everything, and it went well.

The Tragic Loss

Then one day, a young girl of his age came with a simple fever. He was not worked up with something as trivial as a simple fever. It was a common occurrence, so he simply sent the blood samples for a fever profile and some other tests. He had other more complicated cases to deal with. The next day due to some reason, the results didn’t arrive, and he accepted the fact that the huge number of reports probably would take so much time. But the condition of the girl did not improve. Moreover, she started to lose her consciousness. He thought it had to be due to weakness or maybe anaemia. She had no other signs that could have indicated otherwise. He decided to draw her blood himself and sent them personally to the lab. That night, she got into a comatose state due to intracranial bleeding and the next day, she passed away. Ironically, the reports came that day indicating dengue.

Ironically, the reports came that day indicating dengue. He could not believe how fast the disease would progress and he started to blame himself for her death. His jolly nature left him. My friend rarely talked about work after that. He became so serious with his patients that he avoided our meetups. He started to tire himself out. Furthermore, he started to hate himself for not being good enough. I tried to help but it didn't work. He still keeps a copy of the report of her death so that he never forgets it.

Lessons from Kafka on the Shore

This part from Kafka on the Shore by Haruki Murakami resonates so much with his life and how it changed him:

“Sometimes fate is like a small sandstorm that keeps changing directions. You change direction but the sandstorm chases you. You turn again but the storm adjusts. Over and over you play this out like some ominous dance with death just before dawn. Why? Because this storm isn’t something that blew in from far away; something that has nothing to do with you. This storm is you. Something inside of you. So all you can do is give in to it, step right inside the storm, closing your eyes and plugging up your ears so the sand doesn’t get in, and walk through it step by step. There’s no sun there, no moon, no direction, no sense of time. Just fine white sand swirling up into the sky like pulverized bones. That’s the kind of sandstorm you need to imagine. And you really will have to make it through that violent metaphysical, symbolic storm. No matter how metaphysical or symbolic it might be, make no mistake about it: it will cut through flesh like a thousand razor blades. People will bleed there and you will bleed too. Hot red blood. You’ll catch that blood in your hands, your own blood and the blood of others. And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm is all about.”

These words reflect the internal struggle Dr. Raj experienced after the girl’s passing. He had to face his own mortality and the fragility of life. The transformation was painful, but it also led to growth and emotional resilience.

Conclusion

Transformation is an inevitable part of life. It can be positive or negative, but it leaves an indelible mark. Dr. Raj’s story is a reminder that even in the midst of tragedy, we can find the strength to move forward and become better versions of ourselves.